Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow

Yesterday was Day 15 after chemo.  My head has been hurting for a while now but yesterday it got really bad.  When I say "my head," I don't mean as a headache (though I have those too) - I mean as my hair follicles.  It's like when you try to brush your hair the wrong way - it hurts.  That's how my head feels even when I'm not touching it.  I did what I do everyday, I yanked on my hair to see what would happen - nothing did.

I woke this morning, Day 16, with the same feeling - hair follicle pain!  But, suddenly this morning, when I did what I've done for the 16 days - yanked on my hair - a huge clump came out!  So, of course, I yanked out some more!  It was kind of cool!

After doing this 3 or 4 times and showing my husband, I then decided it wasn't so cool!  It's really here!  It's really happening.  Now instead of pulling my hair out, I'm patting it trying to keep it IN!

Because, let's face it, I love all my hoarded hats - but I love them more sitting on my dresser than I do on my head!  I didn't really ever want to have to wear them!  I just hoarded them IN CASE my hair fell out - but it's not supposed to ACTUALLY happen!

Upon seeing the carnage that is happening on my head (though I have very thick hair, you can't tell anything yet), my husband practically sprinted to get his razor.  His eyes gleaming, he wanted to shave my head immediately.  I find this suspicious and unsettling.  Now that he's a baldy, he is way too anxious to have his wife be bald as well.  What a weirdo!

Me in a Couple of Days.

I'm not ready to shave it.  Not yet.  I know it won't be long now.  It's going.  And I don't want too end up looking like the Crypt Keeper (as my friend, Shelly, calls it).  But, I'd like to hold on to it for a little longer.  It's going to be several months before I see it again and it may never be the same.  I'm going to wash it today, probably for the last time.  We'll see if anything is left after that...though, like I said, I have really thick hair so I could probably hold out for a few days before officially passing for the Crypt Keeper.

After pondering this situation I'm now in, I did what any rational woman would do - I tried to see if some of the hair on my legs would fall out.  Nothing happened.

Life is so cruel.