I told my husband that when this was all over with, he was going to have a really hot wife. I don't know if the look on his face was excitement or fear.
See, not only will I have new boobs, but I'll also have straight teeth. Yes, I have braces...on my teeth, not my legs. Yes, I really am a 41 year old woman with braces. Why are you laughing? See, I didn't get them as a teenager though my parents really hoped I would. But, my older brother ruined it all for me because he had braces and he was such a big baby about them that there was no way I was subjecting myself to that type of torture! (He now says that he was faking it for attention - typical!) Then as an adult, I grew to hate my teeth - ugh, I became more and more self-conscious about them and, finally, I got up the courage in September of 2010 to get braces. I now look like a total dork and I have a severe drooling problem but by the time December 2012 rolls around, I'll have straight teeth! (I really hope the world doesn't end that month as predicted - otherwise I'm going to be TICKED!)
Also, I've heard stories about women who have chemo, lose their hair and then their hair grows in totally different. I kind of like my hair, but I figure this might be my chance to finally be blonde! Or a red head! (Though, let's face it, with my luck, it'll all grow back in totally grey.)
Anyway, so let's add this up - straight teeth + new hair + new boobs = hot wife.
It's a good thing my husband already snatched me up because I'm going to be a hot commodity. Too bad he has to live through the interim when I have no boobs, no hair and braces - not such a hot look. On second thought, maybe it's a good thing I made sure HE is committed to ME! Poor guy!
Boob Count = 45